In January 2010, I wrote a post for my Living Single blog called Not going nuclear: So many ways to live and love. In it, I wondered about a fundamental question of our lives – how do we choose to live, now that we don’t all live in the sentimentalized nuclear family household comprised of mom, dad, and the kids – and no one else – all under one roof? How do different arrangements work out, with regard to fulfilling our needs and desires? How can each of us achieve just the right mix of time alone and time with others?
[Bella’s intro: Recently, a retired Navy veteran, Roger Morris, wrote to say that while he believed there was some singlism in the Navy, he also thought there were advantages to being a Navy single. I asked if he would elaborate on his perspective and share his wisdom with “All Things Single (and More)” readers and he very kindly agreed. In fact, he has so much to say that I’m presenting his essay in two parts. This is the first. Many thanks to you, Roger Morris, for the time you took to do this important research and writing. By the way, readers, see all that red on the map image accompanying this post? It shows all the places Roger Morris has been!]
Back during my East Coast days, there was a year when a colleague invited me to go to her daughter’s play on the 4th of July. I don’t like doing that sort of thing all the time, but I do enjoy kids’ performances occasionally, so that was fine. The play was around noon, so I figured we’d spend the rest of the day together.
Writing about singles has been an enormously meaningful experience, but it has not been a lucrative one. I’ve had fantasies about making a mint on Singled Out or Singlism or from blogging. Not gonna happen.
What I fantasized about is not stuff like buying a yacht or traveling around the world. What I really wish I could do is support single people and singles activism and advocacy. So here I’d like to share some of my starry-eyed ideas that will never come to fruition from my meager royalties or paychecks. I hope you will add some of your own.
Every so often, someone publishes one of those predictable “best places to be single” stories. They are always the same – they are not about places for people who want to live their single lives, but instead about the best places to become unsingle. I’ve been thinking about the question because of an email I recently received from a reader, Rosemary.